90+ Law Puns That Will Stand Up in Court

Get ready to approach the bench… with laughter! If you’re into legal humor or just looking to lighten up the courtroom mood, these law puns will definitely plead your case.

Whether you’re a lawyer, law student, or just someone who finds the legal world amusing, this pun-filled list will have you objecting — with joy.

So grab your briefcase of jokes and let’s make justice fun, one pun at a time!

Law Puns

• You’ve been served… with laughs!

• I rest my pun.

• Guilty of loving bad jokes.

• Order in the pun-house!

• Sue me for loving this!

• I object… to boring humor.

• Let’s make a case for comedy.

• Stay brief, counsel.

• Justice is blind, but it still has a sense of humor.

• The jury’s still out on that one!

• I’ll plead the fifth… pun.

• This is beyond a reasonable chuckle.

• Hearsay, but hilarious!

• This joke is in contempt… of boring humor.

• I’m here to litigate laughter.

• Bar-ing any objections, let’s laugh.

• These puns are binding.

• Keep it civil, counselor!

• That joke was statutorily funny.

• I’m a firm believer in legal laughs.

• This joke has precedent.

• Let’s cross-examine your sense of humor.

• It’s verdict-ably hilarious!

• My comedy has no alibi.

• Your Honor, I plead hysterical.

• Objection! That pun was too good.

• Consider this amicus curiae of comedy.

• I’ll file this under funny.

• Court me with humor anytime.

• That pun is on the record!

Law Jokes

• Why don’t lawyers ever play hide and seek? Because good luck pleading the fifth when found!

• What do you call a lawyer who doesn’t chase ambulances? Retired.

• Why did the judge go to art school? To learn how to draw conclusions.

• How do you greet a lawyer? With subpoena colada!

• What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a librarian? All the right citations.

• Why was the courtroom so loud? Too many oral arguments.

• Why did the lawyer sleep with a light on? In case of a brief encounter.

• How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? Three — one to change it, one to bill for time, and one to sue the bulb company.

• Why was the law student always broke? Too many legal fees and not enough billable hours.

• What’s a lawyer’s favorite drink? Sustained soda.

• Why did the attorney wear a neck brace to court? He had a whiplash of arguments.

• What’s a lawyer’s favorite type of music? Bar-oque.

• Why was the lawyer always calm? He was well-briefed.

• What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We’re in the same suit.

• Why don’t lawyers go skydiving? Too many loopholes.

• Why did the jury get fat? Too many trial snacks.

• How does a law student relax? By appealing to Netflix.

• Why don’t lawyers trust stairs? They’re always leading.

• What’s a defense attorney’s favorite exercise? Cross-examination.

• What do you call a lawyer who helps animals? A paw-secutor.

• What did the witness say to the funny lawyer? “You’re out of line… and hilarious!”

• What do you call a law firm run by cats? Purr-suasive Legal Services.

• Why did the case fall apart? No one could sustain the argument.

• What happens when a lawyer eats too much? Objection! Indigestion!

• Why did the lawyer take a ladder to work? To climb the legal ranks!

• What’s the most dramatic law term? Contempt!

• Why did the law book look so worn out? Too much cross-examination.

• What do you call it when a judge tells jokes? A sentencing of comedy.

• How do you know a lawyer is good at their job? They sue-percede expectations.

Law One Liners

• I’m billing you for this pun — by the laugh.

• Legally hilarious.

• Justice is served… with a side of puns.

• You can’t handle the pun!

• Objection: too funny to ignore.

• All rise — for this joke!

• Beyond a reasonable joke.

• Court is now in pun session.

• Sustained giggles only.

• Law school? More like laugh school.

• Briefs aren’t just for court.

• In legal terms: pun-ishment fits the joke.

• Discovery phase: found my funny bone.

• Law and pun-der.

• Your humor is witness worthy.

• Motion to laugh: granted!

• The legal system needs more laughter.

• I’m here to practice laugh.

• No appeal needed — this joke wins.

• Case closed, joke ruled supreme.

• I put the fun in fundamental rights.

• Jury of my peers found me guilty… of puns!

• Judge me not — unless it’s for my comedy.

• On the record: pun intended.

• Legal laughs are binding.

• Filing this under funny business.

• Bar exam? More like pun exam.

• A well-timed pun is precedent-setting.

• Law humor? Case in point.

• Serving legal looks — and laughs.

Law puns bring order, laughter, and just the right amount of cheeky justice. Whether you’re briefing your friends, adding flair to a lawyer’s speech, or captioning legal memes, these puns are here to make your verdict clear: humor wins the case every time. Court adjourned — with a smile!